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About Me Official Beta Tester Gift-Giver Danielle Nguyen22/Female/Australia Recent Activity Deviant for 2 Years
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Fear

Journal Entry: Tue Apr 21, 2009, 3:02 AM

Musings

Have you ever felt as though you had become so lost in your life that you couldn't even come up to breath from its depths? Right now I'm tackling my inner demons and thoughts. Do I do whats right for me? Should I be selfish and make myself happy for one of the first times in my life? Or do I hold onto something that is hurting me inside simply because I feel obligated to? Because I am too scared to hurt anyone?

I hate feeling this lost and confused in my life. I don't want to hurt anyone and I am terrified of things changing from what I've been so used to. This scares me to no end. I wish there was more I could say, but really, there is nothing else I can say...

All I know for sure is that teh stress, thoughts and anguish are making me mentally ill and now the emotional sickness is turning into physical sickness. I feel so run down and alone in my thoughts that I am slowly dying here. I have no true outlets because I don't know how to tell anyone or talk to them about my particular problem. As for the source...they know, but what happens when you can't change how you feel or how things have already changed in your heart due to their actions? How do I go back in time and feel how I did before? How do I mend a heart in pieces and learn to care the same as I did before? How do I do this after so much neglect and loneliness?

I'm afraid and my fear is driving me. HOw do I make my choice? How do I decide my entire future on the flip of a switch? You'd think this simple yes or no question would be so much simplier, but its so much more complicated and difficult then anyone can ever know until they've been through it.

I think, more then any kind words or helping hands, I simply need support right now; support in knowing that whatever choice I make is the right one and that I have people here for me on the other end no matter which end I come out of. THAT is what I need most.

Goodbye for now.

-Danielle

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Feature










* Journal CSS and design by *MelyannaM
* Stock from sxc.hu
  • Mood: Neutral
  • Listening to: I'm Yours - Jason Maraz
  • Reading: Physics of the Impossible
  • Drinking: Earl Grey Tea

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Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Sydney, Australia
  • Interests: Illustration, writing, boxing, exotic parrots, scientific theory, astrophysics, ancient history
  • Favourite movie: Gladiator, Marie Antoinette, The Other Boleyn Girl, Perfume, Wanted, Babylon AD, Fight Club, Merlin
  • Favourite band or musician: Billy Joel, Fragma, ATB, Laava, Missy Higgins, Hans Zimmer, Yiruma, DJ Hixxy, VNV Nation, Sash!
  • Favourite genre of music: Vocal trance, Indie, Rock, R&B, Classical, Jazz
  • Favourite artist: Brom, C-D, Lullaby-Child, Danielle Claire (Halothane), Nati
  • Favourite poet or writer: Elizabeth Haydon, Stephen Hawking, Sara Douglas, Neil Gaiman, Marriane de Pierres, Sarah Zettel
  • Favourite photographer: Cassandra Butler (Spadefreak)~
  • Favourite style of art: Traditonal media all the way, Baby. <3
  • MP3 player of choice: Ipod with video, yay for something to do on the train...
  • Favourite game: Samurai Warriors 2, Oblivion, Day of Defeat, EvE, DDR, Max Payne, Neverwinter Nights
  • Favourite gaming platform: XBOX 360, Computer, PS2
  • Favourite cartoon character: Does "Wolf" from Fables count?
  • Personal Quote: "Life IS drama, stop trying to avoid it and learn to LIVE with it."
  • Tools of the Trade: Pencil, watercolors, copic markers, ink, acrylics, brush pens <3
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Comments


:icontransparentplz: :iconeufrosis: :iconjelloplz: :iconeufrosis: Thank You! :iconeufrosis: :iconjelloplz: :iconeufrosis:

--
The dream was always running ahead of me. To catch up, to live for a moment in unison with it, that was the miracle. (Anais Nin)
Hey Adielle, Thanks for the fav on "The Distance"! [link]

--
"If you're Damned if you Do and Damned if you Don't
....Better to be Damned that you Did"
Thomas M. Thomson

my websites:
[link]
[link]
Thank you very much for the fav and watch :heart:
HALLO

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give me your heart and your soul.
Hi :)
Thanks for the fav
:rose:

--
'Humans act first, think later and feel last of all'

DA Gallery
Website
Thanks for the fav!

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I apologise in advance for my awful spelling.

"It bites having someone in your head, dosen't it?"
-The Question, Justice League Unlimited
Thanks!

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I would have told her that
she was the only thing
that I could love in this dying world
but the simple word love itself
already died and went away
Thank you so much for the :+devwatch: and the :+fav:! :)

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(insert witty signature here)
---thank you:)---

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____"Tiny Crack In The Globe's Perfection"____

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